My pastor just called me and wants to see me tomorrow. Apparently my husband called him to get some attention. He has been living at our local shelter, (my husband, not the pastor *grin,*) for more than a week, after storming out of the house in another one of his tirades.
Right before speaking to my pastor, my husband called from outside the local library, where he screamed obscenities into the phone at me, as loud as he could. The outburst lasted somewhere in the neighborhood of ten minutes and I sat and wondered how many people from church might have seen his outburst.
And I still hold on to the very pride in myself that keeps him in captivity. Forgive me Lord.
Maybe my words seem callous, but my husband is an emotional vampire and I am so tired of living this way. It’s like having a marriage with a very large, ill behaved six-year-old. He has chosen to squander his time, by not seeking employment and when he does, he applies for jobs that you would need a masters degree to obtain. Considering he was in home remodeling, applying for a regional sales rep job, is pretty much out of reach, but he would never see it that way. I am waiting for him to come home and tell me he has decided he will now pursue brain surgery.
Meanwhile, I continue to take care of my family by being the only adult in the house. But praise Jesus, I woke up this morning.